I guess I took a bit of a break from blogging. Okay, truth be told, I haven't really been into it for a while. I got out of the habit when my computer fell down go boom.
Also, I hate February. If there's a time of year that I'm absolutely uninspired and blasé about everything, it's February. The only redeeming quality that February has is that it is the shortest month of the year. I wonder if February is as hated in other climates as it is here. Even November can't touch February.
So, what now that it's no longer February? Well, nothing. Life is pretty even-keeled lately and I guess I should be happy about that. The only abberation is that my sleep is so rare and unsatisfying that I broke down and asked the doctor for sleeping pills. She gave me Imovane. We're hoping that it's something less serious like my brain forgetting how to stay asleep, as opposed to the more dangerous problems.
My big problem is that I'm always tired. I've always been on the lethargic side, but I don't think I've ever wanted to spend so much time in bed. Asleep. "Could it be anemia?" you may ask. It's unlikely, because I would probably sleeping more than anyone could imagine and still feeling tired. I wake up 2, 3, 6, 7 times a night. Sleep apnea has been bandied about (mostly by me), and so my GP has thoughtfully refered me to a ororhino-laryngologist, aka an Ear-Nose-Throat doctor. Said specialist will look around for loose pieces of whatever that shouldn't be there and (hopefully) refer me to a sleep clinic where they will determine what kind of sleeper I am, what my problems actually are, and what fixes there may be. My biggest fear is that it will be nothing with an easy fix like "Get out of your sometimes-mouldy condo" or "switch to latex bedsheets", but rather something biological or chemical that will require long-term medication. If there's anything I find frightening in a very real sense, it's the idea (or reality) of becoming dependent on pharmaceuticals for a good 8 hours. What would happen if/when I get pregnant and then am nursing? Not sleep for the better part of two years? That doesn't sound like a good way to start motherhood. I mean, I know that having a baby intrudes on regular sleep patterns, but not being able to sleep at all sounds like a gourmet recipe for post-partum depression and Brittney Spears-esque antics. (It's my belief that she's suffering from severe PPD and if people would stop making fun of her long enough for her to have some privacy, someone might be able to figure that out. And it is possible that she would be driven to go commando or stay out all night partying -- remember the mother who killed her 5 children?)
Anyway, that's a little large to be worrying about. After two nights of pills, I've had one great sleep and one not-so-great sleep. The not-so-great sleep was due to being cold. Unfortunately I was too doped up to be aware of what was wrong, so it wasn't until about 7:30 am when the drug wore off and I thought, "Gee, I'm cold." I'm planning some fail-safes for tonight.
The good news is that it's March. I only have 5 teaching days left until March Break and, although I'm not going to the Mayan Riviera like some people (I hate you), I do get to sit around and do nothing (except clean) and relax (and do lesson planning). I'd like to do something more exciting (and warmer) but I can't afford it this year. And probably not next year. But I will at some point.
And then I will write a blog to gloat.