My life is busy. Not overwhelmingly so, but enough to make me crazy. Enough that, by Friday, I just want to sit and stare -- at walls, the tv, the ceiling, whatever. Enough that I feel braindead most of the time, now, unless I exert an enormous amount of effort.
So, I've recently decided to start making adjustments. It's not going very well so far. The issue is that Monday through Thursday evening, I am always booked. I'm sure lots of people have busy lives, but I just don't enjoy it. I need time to myself. Otherwise I get cranky and down and breaindead, and all those other things.
So, the first thing to go will be massage therapy. It will be sad, because it makes me feel better. I just need to reclaim that night, and I can't go during the day. But now I give it up to other obligations. Sure, some of them are social, but I still need time to me.
I'm going to cut back on trivia night, as much fun as it is. Tomorrow will be Jaye's last night, and with Lindsay's new responsibilities, she won't be there as often. Katherine and I will still go, but I need to cut it back -- maybe I'll go every other week.
I might move yoga to the weekend when the new session starts. Yoga is a great way to start the week, but it's also another night when I don't get home as early as I'd like.
Thursday is always the day I use for everything else I don't have time for. If I have nothing else to do, I start the staring early.
I don't know if this is "woe is me" whining or if it's something to be legitimately concerned about. I know there are lots of ways to reduce stress, but it's not just stress that gets to me. At least, it doesn't feel that way. It feels more like pressure, or a sense of being overwhelmed. Maybe I'm being naive and it's all the same thing, but it just feels different than when I had a major essay due, or when I'm approaching a deadline at work.
I'm hoping that my upcoming vacation (I leave in a month!) will help. But I also hope that I can gain some control over my life and give myself more time to breathe through the week.
I'm open to suggestions.